Men and Anger: Why vulnerability is the new masculinity

Males experience similar emotional experiences and feelings in life. A lot of times they shied away from it because it’s looked at as not masculine for whatever reason. These common emotions are anger, irritability, depression, and hopelessness. These negative emotions make men extremely withdrawn from how they’re feeling, which is why they tend to lash out, which makes others misunderstand their emotions. Men who express their emotions are looked at as feminine and weak, and they grow up to hide and resent the way that they’re feeling. Nowadays society looks at strength and power as the most powerful and controlling emotions because men tend to hide behind these feelings, especially when feeling confronted or cornered.

Men’s approaches to mental health are heavily influenced by traditional beliefs and cultural norms. Emotional control and toughness are taught to men at an early age so they are conditioned to know that showing their emotions and the way they feel is wrong. It’s like when your son gets hurt on his bike and he starts crying because he scraped his knee. Instead of making sure he’s okay and giving him a hug, as his mom, you decide to tell him to tough it out and stop crying because he’s a man. Who’s to say that when he’s older and he decides to get mad at his wife and do something he may regret because his emotions explode, being told to suppress them for so long it all comes to a head? While this may seem like an overreach, those small situations when we are children tend to set us up for how we respond to people and things in the future.

Criteria Many don’t realize that this jumpstarts an insecurity in men that is hard to fix once they are grown. These behaviors that were suppressed can come out to be explosive behaviors later that may come out in gambling or driving. That also puts a fear of judgement and stigma that if a man does show his emotions, he is a loser and cannot process things correctly, which is the furthest thing from the truth. There are several organizations that offer emotional services for men looking to build emotional awareness and improve their mental health. You should take a look in the mirror and see if you meet any of these criteria and how to stop uncomfortable situations from happening because you couldn’t find a healthy way to express your emotions.